Good evening. I’m currently 22 years old. I graduated from the university last year. I was in a situationship with someone for almost two years. I loved him deeply, so much that I made mistakes I’d never stand by and watch my friends make, to the point of using my school fees to fend for him. I have never, for once, billed him. When the situationship was just three months old, he credited me N10k and N20k on two different occasions. I never asked him for it; he just did it, which I really appreciated. I’m a very hardworking person. I’m a fashion stylist, a model, and I do basically almost everything decent enough to earn me small money to support myself, aside from my mum. She has been my biggest supporter. In the two years we were together, he had multiple partners, which he never hid from me. He claimed he had a disorder that made it difficult for him to sleep alone, which was the reason he always had girls around. My school was in another city, 20 minutes away from his.
I’d always go there just to be sure he was okay. When things got so bad for him, I started giving him from mine. I never complained. I always tried to buy him things, pray for him, and engage in meaningful conversations. I cried more than I smiled when I was with him. I even lost myself. As for the school fees episode, it backfired, and I’m facing the consequences. His affairs hurt me so badly. They reduced my self-esteem. I felt I was less and wasn’t enough. Mind you, I’m a very beautiful person. I would confront him, and he’d flip on me and invalidate my feelings. I eventually started noticing a pattern with him. He only came closer when he needed something from me. So many things happened that I can’t even type all of them. I told him to be sure of where he stood. Don’t bring up conversations about sharing a future with me and introduce me to your family, just to tell me, “Did I ask you out?” whenever I confront you for hurting me. He even told me one time that he never asked me for anything.
Eventually, we officially broke up. It took me a whole lot, but I moved on, and I’m healing at my own pace. The issue now is my parents, my mum and her partner, whom I take as my dad. Two years ago, I found out he was carrying girls from a colleague of mine. The whole situation leading up to it confused me. I didn’t know what to do. First of all, I was upset that they thought because I was a showbiz influencer and manager, they assumed I was also into hookups. Thank God for my decency. My colleague reached out to me as soon as possible that someone had sent my picture to him, asking if I was a prost!tute. It broke my heart when I realised it was my dad. Then, the following year, I found out my mum was in on it too. I tried to move on from it, but my colleague made a statement about my dad carrying girls from him. Initially, I was hurt, but then I took it as my colleague was probably very drunk, so he was uncertain of what he was saying. My mum and him are currently not married. He initially made it seem like it was my mum’s fault, but he is still currently married.
He’s been with my mum for over 10 years, and they have a daughter who is eight years old. He still hasn’t divorced his estranged wife but claims he wants to marry my mum. He made it seem like my mum wasn’t ready to marry because she felt he was going to control her. A few days ago, I found condoms in his shirt while I was searching for a shirt to steal for myself. I thought they were for him and my mum, so I didn’t overthink it. Last night, my mum called me and told me a whole lot, which eventually made sense to me. He has painted this saintly image of himself, like he’s incapable of sin, which my mum and I believed. He made my mum look like the aggressive villain. My mum might have her shortcomings because I know how she gets when she’s upset, but she rarely gets upset. She reacts when provoked. She said a lot that made me realise that the condoms weren’t for them. So, who were they for? I was so upset. I opened up to my mum about the condoms and the conversation with my colleague. I even called my colleague, and my mum heard it herself.
It dawned on me that my colleague was serious. I broke down because my mum thinks I betrayed her by not telling her on time. Honestly, I just didn’t want to involve myself in the drama. I just decided to believe what she believed. Now, she has left the house tonight for another city, where he is, to confront him. She said I should pack our things because we are heading to our house tomorrow, my mum’s place in another state. I’m worried about my mum. I’ve never seen her cry. I can’t help but feel like my mum and I have been used. Ten years of her life. I feel so bad right now. I don’t know if what I did was right or wrong.
Also Read: Was I Truly Wrong in All These Situations?