I am 28 and my hubby is 28 also, we are living outside Nigeria. Coincidentally, my former coursemate is his coworker at his current job. I will call her Alexa, and she’s Nigerian too. I’ve told my husband about all my coursemates and I have even shown pictures and videos of them to him, like from their social media posts or the pictures I take with them. He knew about Alexa before she started working with him, so I was kinda shocked when he came to tell me he thinks he’s working with Alexa. At first, it was funny and just cool, but I started feeling some type of way when he told me she asked for his phone number so that he can help her understand work activities (they are in the health sector and she’s new). I was kinda shocked when he said he gave her because we both agreed that we wouldn’t be close to any coworker at all.
He also told me he told her I’m his wife and she was surprised (this was before she asked for his number). So the issue now is she has sent some messages and has called once to ask for help. I feel weird because he told me himself that she is very close to another female coworker, so I’m here wondering then why is she calling and texting him for help?
And he also told me that she admitted to him that we are not friends, but we used to talk and greet ourselves when we saw in school. I have already told him how I feel with this development and he has assured me that he keeps to himself and I’m his wife. He told me to trust him and focus on him, that he doesn’t think that way and it’s just work and money on his mind (minus me and his family, of course). But I still feel insecure and I don’t know why. She called him today asking for directions for some medication and my heart wanted to explode. I’ve been in the bedroom since and he’s in the living room, but there’s an awkward vibe and I can feel anger and anxiety in me. I don’t want to assume or conclude, but my last relationship was very toxic and my ex used to use the same lines to lie to me and sleep with his ‘school daughters’, friends, and ‘little sisters’.
The unhealed part of me is convincing me that there will be a repeat of history, but I’m trying to fight these nasty thoughts away. Please, I need advice. I don’t know what to do. Do y’all think I’m overreacting and overthinking things? P.S: Alexa and I have not communicated since December last year, so I feel very weird about everything.
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