I’m a lady in my early twenties. I finished school last year, and honestly, things haven’t been going well for me. Life has been heavy, and I’ve learned that someone can be happy right beside you while you’re silently struggling. My family has been dealing with a lot. My dad has been in a court case since last year because of a road accident, and it has drained us financially and emotionally. On my own side, I’m the first child trying to figure out life with no helper and no steady support. What hurts me the most is my relationship with my mom. I’m trying to understand her, but I don’t feel understood at all. My younger sister is doing better because she has someone who supports her financially and sends her money. I don’t have that. Because of this, I’m constantly reminded of my situation. I’m insulted, called names, and told I have bad character. It feels like I’m always seen as the problem. I’ve tried to have proper conversations with her, but they never end well. Things get twisted, and I end up feeling worse.
I’m currently on a 21-day fast and prayer programme, and I’m trying not to let anger or bitterness take over, but deep down, I’m not happy. I thought about staying with my sister for peace of mind, but my mom says I want to be a burden to her. At the same time, if I stay away and don’t talk to her, it becomes another issue. No matter what I do, it feels wrong. I just want her to understand that I’m not weird, I’m not w*cked, I’m just struggling. The truth is, I’m very broke right now. I can’t even afford transport or basic needs. I own a brand, but sales haven’t been coming in since last year. I feel weak, confused, and alone. I don’t really have anyone I trust enough to talk to about all this, so I’ve been carrying everything inside. I just need to be understood. I need advice and encouragement from people who’ve been through something like this. How do you keep going when home doesn’t feel like a safe place and you’re trying so hard not to give up?
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