I have a baby with a guy I never dated. We met at a party three years ago, and one thing led to another, and I got pregnant. I didn’t tell him because I was in a relationship. I kept the baby and only told him when the baby was born. My parents are strict and insisted that he pay my bride price if he wanted access to the child. He said he couldn’t do that because he wasn’t in love with me. Well, that passed, and I still kept communication with him. He made it strictly about the child. He sends money for the child’s upkeep and school fees, but I feel like, as the mother of his child, I am supposed to have privileges, like him sending me money for my business because I want to start something. He is in a serious relationship, and I hear they are planning to get married, and I feel so heartbroken. I feel like he owes me as the mother of his child. I wonder what my child’s place will be when he starts his own family. Am I being entitled? Whenever he wants to send money, I notice the account is his girlfriend’s account, and it makes me feel some type of way.
I feel like she is trying to come between his role as a father, or she is trying to take charge of the relationship he has with my child. I see my friends who have baby daddies, and they have good relationships with them, not just about the child. They talk like people who once had something to do with each other. Some even still have something going on between themselves. Why is my own different? What can I do to make him treat me the way I feel he is supposed to? I am the mother of his first child. My child and I should come first, even if he wants to start a family. I have tried lots of ways, and I don’t know what else to do. He was single when I met him and when we had the baby. I feel sad that he went on to have a relationship.
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