I left my ex in 2023 because he cheated on me with a lady he always lied that he had nothing going on with. We dated for almost 5 years, but I had to leave because I was raised to believe I was not a second option in people’s lives. I could’ve fought a lot for this relationship because of the stuff I invested in that relationship, coupled with the fact that he was my first everything and we achieved a lot together, but my mind wasn’t at rest the minute I caught the lady at his place, and that was the last time we spoke to each other. I have different skills, and even though I’m an introvert, I try as much as possible to socialise. But ever since I left this relationship, everything went downhill for me. I managed to survive on my own for 3 good years after the breakup because I don’t have a support system. The reason why I’m writing here is that I want you guys to blame me for taking this decision that has cost me a whole lot. I was going through a rough path in 2025, and things were just not working for me. I couldn’t even boast of 10 naira in my name. Someone advised me to reach out to my ex because for everything he had, I was part of it.
I was reluctant at a point, but because I wanted to go and upgrade my skill and I needed all the help, I chose to reach out to him. We exchanged a bit of pleasantries, and I went straight to the point. For good two weeks plus, he didn’t send me anything, but he started posting on his page how he’s enjoying life and flaunting money everywhere. I’m not mad at that because it has been years. The only thing is that I’ve been blaming myself so much, like why did I listen to people and feel like my ex was the best person I could’ve reached out to? I should’ve listened to my gut and just kept it moving instead of embarrassing myself that way. We did something childish too. I did an oath thing with him, and for years now, I’ve just been hoping he reaches out to me so I can break free from this because I can’t have any s€xual stuff with anyone, and I know for a fact that I’m stupid for this, but my mom is already looking for a way to break it off for me. Do you guys think I was wrong for reaching out to him? I’m going through hard times, and I can’t even remember the last time I made my hair.
I have no friends in my life, and I just want to make money so I can take care of my mom. A relationship is the last thing on my mind. I’ve been crying so much because I felt really bad, and I’m sure they would have said so much about me. That thing is hurting me so badly. I was going through a lot, and that’s the reason why I reached out to him, because when people are overwhelmed, others later say they wish the person had spoken out, but by then, it may be too late. I just need words of encouragement. I will be 26, and I don’t even have a way forward because everything just keeps falling, and I don’t even know what to do. Please advise me, and I would really appreciate it. I’m sorry for any typos in my text. I stopped at SSCE, and I don’t even know what education looks like. I finished SSCE in 2018, and for 7 years plus now, I haven’t achieved anything in my life.
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