A lot has happened this year and looking back, no matter how hard I try to act like it did not get to me, I still cannot forgive myself for being so trusting. I had this friend, her mum and mine were childhood friends, and my mum who barely keeps friends talks about hers a lot. I got into university and found out she was in the same school, so we became friends too, but we got very close in 400 level due to a lot of other incidents. I trusted her, and because my mum and hers shared a good relationship, I believed we would share the same. Last year, I started dating a guy and the relationship was a whole mess, from finding out he had a child to realising that everything he told me was probably a lie, and I told this girl everything like she knew every single detail. I finally ended the relationship about four months ago and was trying to move on when my roommate, who is in a different department, came home and said she heard my story in her department from people I barely know. I was shocked because I barely keep friends, and when my roommate started saying things that even she did not know, I could not help but cry. The girls that shared my story publicly are not people I know. I only know one of them, and we are not even close, but she and my friend talk.
I did not know they were that close. Apparently, my so-called friend was telling people I barely know my full life story without leaving anything out. I was angry at those girls, but later I realised I was focusing on the wrong people because this same girl I called my friend also tells me other people’s stories, and I judged them in my head too. Maybe if I had been smarter and less trusting, things would have been different. It was hard to believe she would do that to me, so I confronted her. She denied it and even sent screen recordings of chats, which were not enough proof because things could have been said elsewhere. She later tried to defend herself, but said something only she knew, and that was when it became clear to me that I had been the fool all along. The experience was humbling. I am glad I did not do anything that could ruin my reputation. It was hard healing from both relationship and friendship heartbreak. I decided to stay cordial with her because of our mothers’ friendship, but it is hard to overlook what she did. Thinking about it made me realise maybe the situation has deeper roots. I have decided to stay single for now and work on myself because that relationship made me realise a lot of things about myself that need improvement. I experienced a lot of growth this year and I hope to make better choices next time.
Also Read: He Moved On So Quickly but I Haven’t