I have been in a relationship for over two years, and it’s been mostly long distance. At one point, things got really sour and rocky between me and my boyfriend, to the point where we even took breaks. During one of which, I did a terrible thing. I made the choice to cheat. I thought if I did so, I would eventually move on from my boyfriend. But it didn’t work like that. I just felt worse than before it happened. It happened once, and I immediately cut it off. I regretted it and moved on and vowed to be a better person, and I was, truly. We ironed things out and really got back into a good space, and things were going really well. Or so I thought. Recently, I found out that my boyfriend also cheated. In fact, he was still in the process of it. His wasn’t a one-time thing; it was an ongoing affair that lasted almost four months. He was seeing this other girl while still in a relationship with me. He was doing literally almost everything he did with me with her, and even after I came back from being away for a while, he somehow continued seeing both of us.
I found out, and already ridden with my own guilt plus this terrible pain and hurt I now feel, I decided to just leave. But he wouldn’t let me. He apologized and pleaded and immediately called things off, cutting her off immediately. Despite everything, I love him deeply, and I decided to stay and forgive him. It’s been months since then, and we seem to be doing really well, though there’s been a few relapses here and there, we’ve been thriving. But now I still feel bothered with this question: should I confess my own infidelity to him, or should I just let it go since he’ll probably never find out? I don’t know if being honest will help us heal or just cause more damage, especially knowing how terrible, hurt, and betrayed I felt after discovering his affair, even with my own secret. And I feel even worse now because I know he plans to propose. I don’t know when, but his friend kind of let it slip and I don’t know what to do. Please help me.
Also read: Dealing With a Possible Infection After First Time Intimacy