I met this man just 5 months ago, and my life hasn’t been the same since. From the very beginning, he was generous — N1.5 million every two weeks. He opened a store for me, bought me a car in the third month, and we’ve been traveling together. He saw what I loved and gave it without me asking. He’s a Muslim man with two wives in his early 40s. From day one, he has made it known to me that he’ll like to marry me — not now, but as time goes by. He said I could live in any state I want, and that works for me. I’ve never been a fan of marriage. I’ve always said I’d rather co-parent with someone sensible than get married. But now I’m conflicted. My mom came from a polygamous family. I know the dangers, the jealousy, the spiritual warfare. I truly believe that was part of what k!lled her. So while I’m not against polygamy, the trauma makes me hesitant. Because otherwise, he treats me very well. My family wouldn’t even be against it, especially my mom’s side; they’re traditional and don’t mind polygamy at all.
He has done more for me in five months than most have in years. I know I won’t lack anything. I can take care of myself and even support my family, who depend on me in many ways. So here I am, in my early twenties, wondering: Do I accept to be his third wife and embrace the security, freedom, and intention he offers? Or do I walk away?
Also read: Is This My Punishment?