I don’t know who to share this with, so I had to come here to pour out my grievance. I had an ab0rtion twice last year, June and August. Ever since then I’ve been trying to heal from it. I feel guilty and bad about it. I always feel depressed. This secret is really killing me. I hid it from my sister. Whenever I see babies damn! I feel more depressed and horrible. I’ve been bottling these feelings for months. None of my friends is aware about it. Sometimes I will wake up in the morning and start crying, my sister would ask me what the problem is. I will just lie and tell her I had a bad dream. I broke up with the guy I got rid of the babies for early this month.
The guilt of getting rid of these babies is really killing me. I might look fine merely looking at me but deep down inside me. I’m dying of agony of unending t0rture. Please I need your advice on how to heal and get past this. I know I will be judged, believe me I’ve suffered myself enough, I know what I did was wrong. I still have the picture of my baby(blood form) on my phone. It came out in a clustered blood form. I find it difficult to delete that picture. I tried deleting it countless times, I always hear a voice whispering to me not to do it. I’m emotionally unstable. I need your advice on how to heal. I don’t wanna take my life because of this. I’m trying hard.
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