I am a travel addict. In fact, in a year, I don’t think I spend three months in total in Nigeria if you add up all the days. Prior to 2024, I used to travel solo. However, due to the frequent rumors about solo female travelers getting harassed in some destinations, I decided to take someone along whenever I traveled. Another major reason was that I needed someone to take my pictures uninterrupted. As a shy person, it always felt difficult for me to approach strangers for pictures when I traveled alone. So, I informed a friend of mine that I’d love to take her along on my next trip. She didn’t have a passport, so I processed it for her express (paid about N200k; I don’t know if I was cheated or not, but she got it the same week. Captured on Monday and received it on Thursday). Then came the visa processing. We did all that and went shopping, where I told her to take anything she wanted.
I wanted to make her comfortable so she wouldn’t feel like just a tag-along. On the travel day, we got to the airport. I asked her to make me some videos, but she said she felt nauseous, so I didn’t bother her. I petted her and told her she’d be fine. We didn’t take any pictures at the airport before take-off. When we landed in Berlin (Germany), I told her I wanted a video of me walking down from the plane. Again, she said she felt uncomfortable because of the crowd. I let it slide. At the hotel, while checking in, she didn’t make any video of me coming down from the car or walking into the hotel. At that point, I was upset because I had told her I was taking her along solely to help me with pictures. I had taken several candid videos of her: walking to the plane, at the airport, pushing our trolley towards immigration, and descending the escalator. When I showed her the videos, she liked them.
But when it came to making videos of me, it was like a hard task. After checking in and resting for a while, I couldn’t hold back. I confronted her about her attitude since the Nigerian airport. Why was it so hard to take pictures and videos of me? She said I should relax; we still had Paris and two other Schengen countries to visit. No apology, nothing. At that point, I was furious. The money I spent processing everything for her could have been used to hire photographers instead. As the days went by, it only got worse. You know those pictures people take in the middle of an empty street with the sun shining? That’s what I wanted. I told her to take me some pictures, but she said I was “reducing her steeze.” The street wasn’t crowded, so I didn’t understand her reasoning. She said she’d only feel comfortable taking pictures at night. At this point, I was frustrated.
I walked off and went straight to the hotel. She followed me and accused me of being dramatic over pictures. I was so mad that I told her I regretted inviting her. That’s when she packed her things, claiming she was leaving the hotel. I asked where she planned to go, but she wouldn’t answer. Eventually, she said she’d go stay with a guy—a Nigerian living there. I felt used. She let me spend all that money only to meet a guy? Even if she wanted to meet him, couldn’t she at least fulfill the purpose of the trip by taking my pictures and videos? I let her go, rescheduled my flight to France, and left Berlin the next day without informing her. The guy eventually told her she couldn’t stay long at his place. She texted me, furious, saying I left her stranded in an unfamiliar country. I forwarded all her tickets to her email, told her everything was paid for, and advised her to either figure things out or return to Nigeria.
She then called our mutual friends, reporting me. Her elder sister also called to insult me. I later had to guide her on how to meet me in Paris because her return ticket date was still far, and she couldn’t afford a new one. When she arrived, I let her stay in my hotel, but we barely spoke. The tension was unbearable. Eventually, I cut the trip short and rescheduled our return tickets to Nigeria. We didn’t speak during the flight or after landing. Up till now, we haven’t spoken or apologized to each other. I replay the events in my head every time I consider reaching out. The insults from her sister made it harder. I decided to let things be. I wonder if I’m wrong for choosing to stay silent.
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