It’s a long story, but I’ll make it short. My dad was against me getting married, even at 29—I don’t know why. Two years ago, I got married without his blessings. He wanted me to go for my master’s, but he was kinda broke during this period. So, my husband and I planned to relocate together, so we married, hoping to relocate after. We got denied and got pregnant during the process. We tried again to have my daughter abroad but got denied again because we didn’t really have much and had no helper. Now, to the main issue—I have never asked my husband for anything extra. He buys food at home and makes sure we are living comfortably, but any extra money, even for his child, na war. I don’t even ask him to support me in business. The highest amount I got from him was N200k, and it was for my ring. My mum covered most of the expenses for my introduction, and even when I gave birth, she carried the larger part. I have already warned her to stop because my husband needs to be a man. If my mum says she wants to start feeding us every day in our marriage, my husband will support it—not that he can’t, but he hates responsibilities.
I don’t even take all these personally. I have accepted my cross. But the main problem now is that, despite being this understanding, this man cheats. I cried fire—cheating is my deal breaker. But now, I really can’t do anything. I don’t have one naira to my name. He even said I can leave the marriage with his daughter, that he won’t ask for her, and that we will suffer together. He’s saying all this because I’m not working, and I lost my job because of my pregnancy. Pregnancy really dealt with me. I feel so useless and handicapped because I can’t do anything. This guy has numerous girls—even while I was heavily pregnant, fighting for my life, this man went to Lagos with another girl, dancing oblee. My question now is—should I just let go since I don’t have any help for now? Will he change? I won’t lie—I have caused a lot of trouble since this thing happened. Even his parents are scared to talk to me. They were just telling him to beg me, and he did. Should I just forget or plan my exit? Is he worth it? I just want to hear from other married women. Men can pass because you all support yourselves—I don’t want your advice.
Also Read: Complicated Relationships