I (29) feel like I’m only in this relationship because I don’t want to hurt my girlfriend (26), and I just want to keep loving her because my mum likes her. This time in 2024, my babe left my place to go see another guy she claimed was a friend. After so many ways of trying to convince her that no guy wants to see you and not want anything more, I knew she did since she didn’t call that same day. I decided not to talk, and this went on for like two months. I can’t remember how exactly we got talking again, after which she later told me everything. She had sex with the guy—and another guy. I felt the pain despite being very loyal to her, and she would testify to this well enough. I told my mum and my elder brother about it later. After everything, they said I should just forgive her and continue the relationship because starting all over again after dating for more than 2 years is not easy. We got back, but I’m not going to lie to myself—I feel hurt anytime I remember and imagine someone else somewhere had sex with the girl I love so much.
I remember vividly when we started dating my words to her were, “I’ve seen your full body, and I’d like to be the only one seeing it, except it’s a male doctor.” For many months now, I really want to start talking to other ladies and didn’t care if she caught me with one because I really want her to feel what I felt. Anytime I see posts, tweets, or anything relating to forgiving a cheating partner, my heart hurts. I find it so hard to talk to anyone because I clearly can’t love two people at the same time, and starting with another person might even be crazier, but I still believe better people exist. So many intimate things we used to do have stopped because she feels irritated by kisses and the likes. So many things are going on in my head: “I need to let my mum know how I’ve been feeling about this,” “I don’t want to hurt her by wasting 3 years with her,” “Maybe I should just set her up and leave because if I marry her, it’s something I’ll still do.” But in all these, I can’t imagine the pain I’ll be feeling every time I remember that she cheated on me. I don’t know what to do at this point. Please.
Also read: My Boyfriend Betrayed My Trust