I have a question about this marriage thing because I’m getting tired. I’m a young lady married to a foreigner, and I live with my in-laws, which is part of my husband’s culture. We met during my first year at university and married quickly. Sincerely, my life is not hard. Everyone is good to me, except my husband. My husband’s twin called me and told me to stop going to my in-laws for things that I should ask my husband for first.
Am I wrong to bypass him? He often finds a way to not do what I ask, and he can be very traditional. For example, he doesn’t let me go out alone or dress a certain way because they are Muslims. My mother-in-law helps me by getting modest but colorful and modern clothes, but my husband doesn’t like them. He also doesn’t want me leaving our children with his parents for long periods, even though they don’t mind.
Last week, we fought because his younger sister cooked instead of me, and he said I’m a bad influence. He also said I can’t go out without his permission and that I should be the one cooking. I’m doing online school, so I’m busy. My mom isn’t helping; she says I wanted to get married, so I should behave and listen to my husband. Should I tell my mother-in-law? I know she would help me. I haven’t been able to go out on my own for days now, and I’m tired.
All I do is take care of the children, housework, and Quran lessons. My kids always shout “mommy, mommy,” and I can’t even go buy coffee. I feel like I’m dying inside. No one has noticed I’m unhappy, except my father-in-law, who bought me cake thinking I had menstrual pain. I’m too young for this kind of restriction. I’m 24, and my husband is in his 30s.