Please, Rantandtalkz community, read my story and give me advice. I’m dying. I’m a 21-year-old mom of 1. Recently, my life has been a roller coaster. I have been in an abusive relationship with my child’s father, and every day I come online to see how this type of relationship I’m in has ended a lot of lives. I don’t want to be among them! I want to save myself, but I don’t know how to go about it because of my child. I don’t want to leave my child behind, but my child’s father is making it difficult for me! I ended everything last week after we had a very heated quarrel. This boy is a narcissist. For the past month, this boy has been accusing me seriously of cheating, and before God and man, I have never cheated on him any day. But he, on the other hand, is a chronic cheat and manipulator! This boy sleeps with anything that’s under a skirt!! Due to multiple occasions of cheating and beating I have received from him, I fell out of love for him. There’s nothing he does that excites me at all because I know he is still who he is. Even when I made it known to him that I was tired and wanted to move on, he would call my parents or his, and they would come together to tell me “nothing is in the street” and I should “stay and make this work because of my child” when obviously this will never work out because of the kind of person he is.
I won’t try to cover my flaws or paint myself good, but any time he starts behaving this way, I don’t hesitate to insult him, and that will always result in beating, as always. But I don’t seem to care because I have had enough! The last straw that made me end this hell I have been enduring was when I found out that he carried a girl along with him to Ghana for a vacation, and I was at home doing nanny duties. That was in December. For the past 3 years, I have been with him, he has never allowed me to travel with him. On my birthday, after much pleading and begging for years, he finally took me to Abuja to celebrate! We spent 3 days there and came back. Mind you, my period came that same night of my birthday, so we did not do anything intimate, and I didn’t know deep down in him he was angry that “How would he carry me to a vacation and not do anything,” as if I was a runs babe. Mind you, we were chilled throughout our stay, and we returned back home. This boy rearranged his bags and told me he was going to Accra to meet his friend for a business update! Unknown to me, it was a planned vacation for him with a girl! I found out last week, and I’m just here thinking of how much of a fool I was because while he was over there, I would call him, talk to him, pray for him to achieve what he went there for, and unknown to me, he was away from Nigeria with another girl!!
When I confronted him, this boy beat me to stupor!! That was when it dawned on me that if I continued to live this way, I would not be alive to look after my child. I have made my decision, but this boy insists it’s either I go and leave my child for him or he will leave me inside his own house and then travel out of the country. I vehemently refused and opted he rent a babysitter for me so I could leave with my child without returning to my mom’s house, but this boy said no! What do I do, please? I do not have enough money to get a place for myself, not to talk about to cater for my child alone. Mind you, I sell online, but if I decide to take the route of leaving, the money I make will not be able to fend for the upkeep of my child at all. And I don’t want to be in this house and continue this relationship with him. I don’t want to end up as another female killed by her supposed boyfriend!! I have called my mom and explained to her countless times, and she still advises me to stay like that and that she’s not in support of me leaving this abusive relationship. I have cried my eyes out. It’s as if God has left me! I don’t know what to do. Please, what do I do? I need your advice.
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