My ex is a narcissist. He cheated on me plenty times. I’ve even lost count. He disrespected me and even tried doing stuff with my close friends. I kept forgiving him, giving him chances, hoping that one day he would change, but no. He kept hurting me in ways I couldn’t understand. Sometimes I ask myself if I wasn’t enough. Yes, he loved me, but because of his nonstop cheating, I started to doubt if he actually loved me. So I cheated back, and that was when everything changed. He showed me a side of him I never imagined. He turned into a d€vil. Sometimes I blame myself for cheating back. I could have just left. Nobody talks about the pain of letting go of someone you still love. Even after all the hurtful things he did, I still have a soft spot for him. He moved on perfectly fine, and I’m still here healing from all the traumatic experiences. Honestly, I’m tired. Healing is very hard. I feel numb, empty, and lost. It’s been a month since I stopped texting him. I miss him so much. I have zero desire to ever try again with him, but sometimes I wish I could sit and explain how he made me feel.
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