My boyfriend and I have been together for years, and he’s a calm guy and also reserved. But he finds it difficult to express himself around his friends; he has a group of friends who’ve been together for years, but this guy doesn’t really talk among them; he just smiles and talks a little bit. You know when you’re doing like a mumu among your friends they’ll definitely ride you or cheat you. That’s exactly what they do to him, but he just absorbs everything inside of him. I always tell him you can be calm and also be expressive, these people are your friends, open your mouth and talk; they can’t beat you, but he no dey hear. It got so worse that when I call him and he’s around his friends, he’ll be whispering and giving one-word answer, and he’s always in a hurry to end the conversation by telling me he’ll call me when he gets home (this is not a matter of cheating or girls being around him; I do hear his friends’ loud voices).
When I go to visit him, and his friends are there, he’ll be doing gentle gentle, he doesn’t really talk to me in front of them except I go inside the room; he’ll come and talk to me. I told him I didn’t like that attitude but he didn’t change. I’m also a quiet and shy girl, but I don’t act like this amongst my friends, I’m very free like a bird. So, I went to his place recently and met one of his friends there, I sat down and the friend actually welcomed me well and was interacting with me and I was responding, but my boyfriend didn’t utter a single word. I was just there pressing my phone like a total stranger; he was just there busy with his phone and laptop, but he talked to his friend sha. Later on, another friend came in and he was talking to that one too, neglecting me totally where I was seated. After that, he chatted with me on WhatsApp and asked if he should buy me drinks and junk outside, then I replied that so he could chat with me but he couldn’t open his mouth to talk to me.
I told him to remind me of a single word he said to me ever since I came, and I told him to keep the same energy. He sha replied, “Has he not been talking to me?” and that I could see that he was busy. I didn’t reply to him again, and he still didn’t utter a word to me. So after a while, I went to lie down inside his room, and he came inside and said, “Why am I angry?” I told him in a loud voice that if he can’t talk to me in public, he shouldn’t come and talk to me in private. He laughed and left the room. So after a while, I carried my bag and left. He saw me off outside, and he didn’t say anything till I took a cab and left. Immediately I got home, I sent him a text that I couldn’t continue with the relationship, that I couldn’t cope with all this nonsense, and he replied, “No problem.” So please, I really want to know if my feelings are valid or did I overreact. I love this guy, but I can’t keep up with this attitude. We’ve been together for years, and I’ve communicated many times, but he doesn’t listen. These friends he’s shying away from, talk about their girls loudly even when I’m there, they adore their babes in front of everyone, but my guy is the opposite.
Also Read: Got Embarrassed At My New Job