I don’t even know how to feel right now, I’m overwhelmed by guilt and pain. I’m in real pain. I’m trying everything in me to forget about my boyfriend, but it’s not working. It’s been one month since he told me that he lost feelings for me and he is no longer interested, neither is he interested in giving me another chance to prove myself. I tried my best, but it wasn’t enough. I never had the intention to play with his emotions or feelings. I loved my boyfriend genuinely more than anything, I found peace with him, and I will never see wrong in anything he does. Only if he just believed me, only if he could put his insecurities aside and give me a chance to prove him wrong that not all ladies cheat or go back to their exes. I never cheated on my boyfriend, I never thought of it for once in my life. But he left me because he thought I would go back to my ex, the same ex I told him that we are both AS and my father is not even in support of the relationship.
The same ex that ill-treated me, someone I blocked everywhere, and this guy used Gmail to send me a message, someone that I blocked his number, he got all these foreign numbers that you buy on the app to call. I tried, God sees my heart, I tried, I never for once in my life think of going back to my ex or betraying the love we shared, or perhaps you never loved me as much I do to you, I don’t even know. He left, saying “It’s not my fault.” I’m scared, will I ever see someone to ever love me in this life? It’s the fear of the unknown. I keep praying to God every day, God, please help me, I’m tired, I don’t know what to do. Someone you talk to every day and you guys can’t do without talking to each other now turned out to be a total stranger. Omo loving and putting your all into someone is a very risky thing to do, and I don’t think I will ever in my life do this again. It’s all pain in the long run.
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