In 2021, when I met my girlfriend, she was in her first year and was sharing a room with her friend (I call her “roomie”). My girlfriend has some male friends in her lodge, they all go to school together. On this faithful day, there was a party at my girlfriend’s lodge. So one of her classmates, Kelly (who doesn’t stay in the same lodge), came to their lodge because of the party, as other male friends of his stay in the same lodge with my girlfriend. This guy called Kelly told my girlfriend’s roommate that he was coming to sleep with my girlfriend tonight and that she should please give him space after the party, meaning she should find a place to sleep. Roomie told my girlfriend what Kelly said, and my girlfriend told me ASAP. We were curious to see if he would actually do that after the party. This incident happened in the evening, the party lasted from night till dawn. My girlfriend didn’t attend the party, and around 2-3 am, Kelly came to my girlfriend’s door, had the audacity to knock, and told her that he was too horny and wanted to sleep with her.
My girlfriend talked him away and informed me immediately. After that incident, I told her to stop being friends with Kelly because he disrespected her and our relationship. They stopped talking, and later they went on one year of industrial training (IT). In early 2023, my girlfriend told me that Kelly apologized for the incident. I said it was okay for him to apologize, but she shouldn’t be free of too close to him, and their interaction should be limited to casual greetings, just “Hi” and “Bye”. So it’s been like that until two days ago. I left Nigeria last year’s end to double my hustle due to the Nigerian economy. Two days ago, my girlfriend went to school, and I had a feeling to call her. She picked up the audio call, and I requested her to switch to a video call. She hung up immediately and didn’t pick up my calls for 16 minutes straight. After 8 more minutes, she called me back, claiming she was in an office with her project defense lecturer, and she couldn’t pick up earlier as her phone was in her handbag. We argued for about an hour, and I ended up smashing my phone screen, I cried while on the call with my girlfriend, who continued lying.
I asked her to show proof of the meeting with her project lecturer, but she went mute. Later, she said she was with Kelly and three friends at the cyber cafe to pay her school fees, using that as the reason she didn’t answer. I called the cafe guy, who confirmed she came in the morning to pay her school fees. The call was around 1 pm. We continued arguing, and she eventually admitted to being alone with Kelly at the cyber cafe, checking the printout of the fees she paid. I called the cyber cafe guy again, confirming she didn’t come back, and that the printout would be ready in two days. She then told me she was with Kelly at an eatery, they went to eat lunch and discuss. I didn’t believe her, so I told her I’d call the Kelly guy. I asked her to tell me the truth about where she was when I called earlier and she said they were just walking to the eatery, and she didn’t pick so I don’t have a problem with seeing Kelly. After a lengthy call with Kelly, he admitted to ordering catfish pepper soup for my girlfriend, and they were walking out of school. He said my girlfriend couldn’t wait for the order and left because I was calling her. Turns out, my girlfriend who doesn’t like fish on a normal day allowed Kelly to order fish for her, and they both jumped on the same bike.
I asked her where she was when she picked up my first audio call, hung up, and called back after some minutes when they were already in a busy place. Again, she stressed me so much and I am drained. She said she was just inside school, walking out with Kelly to the junction where they would pick up the fish he ordered for her. I told her, “If you were inside school walking out with Kelly, why not enter a class or even where other students were and pick up my call since you don’t want me to find out you were with Kelly?” I knew something had gone wrong, and she’s not an honest person, she lies at any time. I have never been this hurt or heartbroken in all my life. For two days now, I haven’t slept well or eaten properly, my mind and mental health are so messed up right now. I asked her, “If you were walking out of the school, why didn’t you take a bike immediately when you saw my calls? Bikes are everywhere in her school.” But my girlfriend told me they saw only one bike while walking out, and she didn’t want to enter the bike because she couldn’t let Kelly be at her back, as I had complained about that happening with one of her lodge guys in 2021.
On speaking to Kelly again, he was a bit open because he noticed I was so stressed. He said he wouldn’t lie, they took the same bike while rushing out to pick up the fish he ordered. Still, my girlfriend didn’t pick up the fish because it wasn’t ready. At this point, I’m drained of my energy, feeling so bad. I have been complaining to my girlfriend that I need peace of mind, but she’s giving me the exact opposite. She wasn’t even remorseful for what she did, she lied repeatedly. For her to tell me that she was at an eatery with Kelly eating shows that there’s a lot she’s hiding. I know she was at a place she’s not meant to be with the guy, and that’s why she used the eatery to lie. In the process of rushing out from wherever she was with him, they jumped on the same bike because bikes are everywhere in her school. Normally, I stay on the phone with her sometimes after school as she jumps on a bike to go buy food. It’s less than a 5-minute drive on a bike to her eatery, and from the eatery to her lodge is about 6 minutes. What’s going on? I need your advice.
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